Eat a hat of humble pie.

With only 20 minutes to kick off I'm standing in a safari playground miles from the nearest TV. Indeed our Sky box is miles and miles away. The perils of half term. I just need to get to the laptop and dongle but the kids won't leave. We've bumped into friends and that's added to the delay. Oh well, the first half on the car radio it is apart from the radio, along with various other bits of the car, doesn't work as well as it once did. As we wound our way through country lanes we got very intermittent commentary. We missed the sending off and the first goal. Twitter alerted us of both. We did get one gem from Ian Dowie however.

"I don't think that's a yellow, he was inches away from playing the ball!"

Yes! Apparently if you are close that's not a foul. Therefore Edwardo and Ramsey weren't fouled by that criteria. That comment by Dowie coupled with the Manchester paper claiming a foul in the opening minutes of a game should never be a red card as it ruins the game (and there are two clubs in that city who know about ruining a game) just goes to prove what a bunch of morons professionally speak and write about football. After the last blog I'll move on as a feel a rant arriving.

Arsenal's performance was as smooth as our coverage was bumpy. It was helped by the sending off but ow anyone can complain about the red is beyond me. The little 8 million pound boy wasn't good enough to deal with that ball by Cesc, fouled MC and had to go. Don't blame the ref, The Arsenal, the sunshine or the boogie. The pass beat him and he brought MC down. Off you go son and thanks for letting your team down.

Having missed the visuals of the first half I had to sit through the half time chat to see the red card and the goal. Jamie Bloody Redknapp! That's why I never watch half time.

The second half was brilliant. Fabianski was fantastic, adding to some good first half saves and I think he may well have been MotM. Fair play to him but we need this time and time again. If he is consistent an odd mistake is tolerated as it's unusual and he's only human. I hope he proves us all wrong and we are feasting on hats made of humble pie.

So a splendid 0-3 away win at Chavscum (North), a side that overnight have bought their way to becoming a rival. We have to tolerate these smaller clubs punching above their station due to shiny new owners. Good luck to them on their soulless quests. I just enjoy putting them in their place. One day we will work out how to do the same to Chavscum (South).

So onto tomorrow night and a cup we could comfortably win. Laptop and dongle to the ready.

Rooney makes Beautiful Game Ugly

So Wayne Rooney has a massive tantrum and gets his pay rise. Shame Man U fell for it but that's the game now. Players bigger than clubs, debts ruling decisions, money talking. Had Rooney gone the money would've disappeared up a Glazer and not been reinvested so they had to let the spud faced idiot have a bit of a scream before giving him what he wanted. Shame nobody else can act like that at work. Great timing too. On a day when the Government announced cuts across the country an over-paid footballer demanded more. The people losing their jobs in the coming months are expected to scrape together enough money to sit in a stadium and cheer on that mug. Just when over-paid pointless entertainers should keep their mouths shut and thank their lucky stars they are paid stupid amounts for playing a game a massive fat headed twat decides to speak out. Maybe he should call his old mate Ronaldo and have a chat about slavery.

It comes at the same time of news that Portsmouth FC may be forced to close down. Don't worry Wayne, Ashley, Adebayor ......as long as you are OK stuff the rest.

I watched 'Once in a Lifetime' last night. An interesting film about the New York Cosmos in the 1970's. There was a warning there. Huge sums of money were pumped into the North American Soccer league. Pele joined the Cosmos to play with a low level of team mates. The money was right so he went. Many other followed him (for the money) and for a moment it looked like soccer would establish itself in the US. Television wasn't interested and the league died.

How much longer can our Premier league live in this false world? The economy is knackered. People will find it hard to go to games. There were empty seats the other night in the making money group stages of the Champions league. Do we really need that nonsense? Dump the bloody group stages. The results in our group would be the same if we were drawn against Trumpton, Balamory and Holby City. Cut to the chase. Knock out straight away. Stop guaranteeing the big sides home game. And while I'm in a foul mood either rename it or only allow champions to play in it. If The Arsenal miss out then we should maybe stop losing at home to West Brom, win the league and take part as champions. There's a plan.

It's this feeling of disgust at the obscene amounts of money tarnishing the beautiful game that means we must beat those hideous bastards on Sunday. A shit little club made 'big' over night much like that other blue outfit in London. Chavscum north and south must be stopped. Maybe thin ice as The Arsenal aren't exactly poor but we can't compete with them financially so I see it as our duty to put these bastards in their place. Skill, coaching, scouting, tactics must defeat greed.

Anyway, if your job is on the line or you've lost income in these economic problems worry not as Wayne et al enjoy the high life safe in the knowledge our heroes won't give you a second thought.

Eastlower & Teddy Sherringham

So what do we all make of that then? It was important to win and win we did but it never felt convincing. Yes we played them off the pitch as we have done with many teams this season yet it didn't seem that surprising when Birmingham scored. Not sure there is anyone to blame for a change. When a striker is 8 foot 6 all you can do is stop the cross. It was a good goal very much against the run of play. However, as we'd decided to not have a shot in honour of Hleb returning and they decided to have a header on target then maybe they deserved to be ahead.

The equaliser was richly deserved despite the calls for a dive. Rooney gets penalties like that (against us) so everyone calling him a cheat (Sky) can get lost. Even MOTD said it was and they hate us! Nasri had a shot on target and it was 1-1. Chamakh Made it 2-1 wit neat footwork after a masterful ball by Lil' Jack. What a player that boy is. Zigic should be thoroughly ashamed of himself for diving after a man a third of his size clipped his ankle but then Goliath did the very same thing when Lil' David took him on. Big pansies the pair of them. Jack took the red card on the chin despite not being able to reach Zigic's chin and we will miss him. Maybe the manager will have to play the club captain for a bit.

I thought that's where my day would end. However I met The Man From Eastlower outside where he furnished me with a customary late birthday present. I've know Eastlower for many years and we've being buying each other crap presents every year. We are both on the look out all year for appropriate tat. He handed me a gift bad with two gifts in. The first was a present to 'relive my past glories.' It was a mullet wig!

It would be rude to not put on a gift wig so it went on. I felt strangely at home. People got their camera phones out and before I knew it two young girls had their arms around me smiling for the cameras. Despite looking like Gerry Francis I felt briefly like a star. I can only think that, from behind, I looked like an Arsenal legend from the early 80's. When they found out it was a wig they left. The mullet pulls in the ladies!

The second gift was an LCD belt with a pre-programmed message that states 'I LOVE TEDDY SHERRINGHAM.' The Man from Eastlower - The True King of Tat. The pressure's on for Christmas.

Why do we do this to ourselves?

I really shouldn't be writing this now. I need to calm down but I want to get this out the way so I never have to think about it again. Beaten by that scum again and it's getting a bit much.

Yesterday I drove a 120 mile round trip to see Cambridge City and Chippenham kick lumps out of each other only for City to lose 1-0 in the 92nd minute. Now The Arsenal kick me when I'm down.

Everything I say is in the heat of the moment. I told you I should've left it. I won't swear as I've used up all the unparliamentary words I know. I'm gutted, disappointed, annoyed. We were the better team. Were we? Possession was enormous but little was done with it. Take the chances.

I was sent for a walk after the second goal. What did they think the chav was doing in the wall? Helping us defend? Surprise surprise! He makes a hole and the ball sails through it. Song turned away. Unforgivable. Didn't see that at non-league.

Injuries, Drogba, Keeper worries (although he was nearly 'faultless' again!), strange loss at home to newly promoted side, injuries, midfield can't defend, injuries.

Same old same old.

Chavs. Scum. Beat.

Now I've finished colouring in the Bieber book I can turn my thoughts to The Arsenal again. Tuesday night was a bit of a blur for me. I was still numb after Saturday and feared the worst. Fabianski was in goal. Nothing can go wrong now! He played well. Credit where it's due.

It was a decent performance with an even better result. The groups of the champs league are purely a money making exercise that needs getting to the end of. Hopefully we can put this nonsense to bed before 'matchday 5 & 6', stick some of the squad players in and dream of bigger 'matchdays!'

I'm pleased for Fabianski. Looks like he will start at the chavs and we need him in top condition. However, two saves does not a goalie make. His back catalogue is littered with crap. He's a 24 track double album with a hit single and 23 fillers. Dave Seaman was called Safe Hands because he had safe hands game in game out. We relied on him. He was never an issue or a worry. He made mistakes, humans do but his mistakes weren't a list. Indeed the itelephone just corrected 'dave' to 'save'. That's how safe Dave was. I miss Save Seaman. I know we need to get behind the players Arsene picks but Fabianski, & Almunia for that matter, need a lot more "faultless" games to convince me they are good enough for The Arsenal.

The Chav game is massive. I know about the points and all that but more important than anything is that club (and now Chav north too) are everything that's wrong with football. Owned by squillionares who don't care about the game and just throw money at it to get success. The Chav team is full of horrible young millionaires who spend and shag their way through life.

Arrrgggggggggggg

Look I really hate them. It's the thing that unites us all. It's the thing we have in common with the spuds. They must be stopped. The heroes in Red and White must step up and defeat the evil. There is so much more at stake then 3 points. The future of humanity rests with our starting 11. Stop tarting about and beat them.

And breath........