Sunday, 17 April 2011

Don't Blame It On The Sunshine.....

....Blame it on Ferguson. Why do we let that man into our ground? Somehow he is able to impose Fergie Time onto games that his horrid little team aren't even playing in. He uses his Jedi Mind Tricks to turn 8 minutes into 11 and make Eboue lose his head in the box. It seems staggering a team can go 1-0 up in the 98th minute and somehow not win. Remember this team can lead 4-0 at half time away and not win or lead 2-0 at home against their biggest local rival and lose. Nothing surprises us Gooners anymore.

I do have some sympathy for Arsene about his gripe about the extra 3 minutes in the extra 8 minutes. However, had the team not twatted about for the previous hour and a half then the 99th, 100th and 101th minutes wouldn't be an issue. It really was more of the same. It's odd really that after a season of awful defending it's our inability to score more than 1 goal at home in 3 matches against beatable opposition that has really finished us off. Even the most positive of Gooners must see now that the dream is over and we must fight hard for 2nd place. What's so frustrating is Man U are nothing special and the title was there for the taking. Man U will be Champions by virtue of being the least shit of us all.

Another frustration is it's another game we dominated from beginning to end and failed to win. Liverpool seemed to hardly have a kick as they ran around injuring themselves. At the end they had players on that made our boys seem middle-aged and yet we still couldn't break them down. They broke the FIFA guidelines on how many ponytails are allowed on the pitch at any one time and they had a bloke called Jonjo which is not even an acceptable name for a dog. His brother Bingo and his sister Banjo were, however, proud of his performance. It's all so predictable and we are often accused of having no plan B. Sometimes I'm not sure we even have a plan A as tippy tappying the ball about looking for the perfect opening surely can't be a plan. Can it?

Our breakthrough came when the ref gave us a penalty in the 98th minute. I like penalties as they force us to shoot. Can't tippy tap a penalty around the team before letting it roll out for a goal kick. Nobody show the team the video below. If it's good enough for Henry and Pires......

Anyway, RVP took a splendid penalty and we were home and dry. Well any other club would be. Ferguson's mind control over the ref let Liverpool attack & get a free kick. It turned Eboue into a defender with the touch of Gunnersaurus who fell on top of a scouser and they equalised in the 2nd minute of our next match.

Collapsing comically is now apparently known as 'doing an Arsenal' and who can argue. Dogs roaming parks without owners are 'doing an Arsenal' (lost their lead!) Gooners are no longer given babies or freshly born lambs as we can't hold onto anything. Arsene said after the game we have to bounce back. What? Again? We are starting to make Tigger look lethargic.

I'm not expecting massive changes in the transfer policy now Silent Stan is in charge but we need to freshen up this side. Every game we fail in is a game nearer to the heart of the team, or Cesc as we know him, leaving. His frustration must be at boiling point. I don't think it would take much but I do think it's time to buy some experience. A player to match the signing of David Platt when he came to us in 1995. A 'been there, done that' player. 88 appearances and 13 goals later he was gone with honours in his back pocket. We need a Plattesque signing or two. That won't kill any younger players. It will make them better, stronger winners. They must all be sick of being the bridesmaids that are promised a shag but eventually don't even get a peck on the cheek.

Onwards to the place that 50 years ago today celebrated their last league title. 50 years! And we are moaning about being 2nd!

Rest in Peace the 96 who went to football, just like you and I do every week, but never went home.

Rest in Peace Danny Fiszman. A true Arsenal gentleman to the end. I hope his vision of where The Arsenal are going can continue in his honour.

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